Monthly Archives: February 2008

Beware!

I was browsing through the virtual space that is perpetually clogged with porn and viruses, also known as the Internet, when I found this.

I like this poster, kudos to the artist. Speaking of artists, I have been practising the art of drawing manga. It all started when the low-class Pancake drew a picture of a naked figure on some table in the tutorial room. Of course, we all start as noobs, but I expect to see significant progress soon since my PSLE T-score is the pwnzor, thank you very much. The main issue I face when drawing these is these figures is getting rid of them after the job is done, since there is a 97% chance that some Secondary 1 student will come across these artpieces. Besides this, there’s also the problem of proportion. Most of the figures I draw look too short and improportionate or too tall and.. well, sharing characteristics with an airport runway. I made my first attempt at a clothed figure today, but it wasn’t very good as the clothes looked really ugly. I want to advance to the level of being able to draw people in costumes, like maids and nurses, but I’ve no idea how to get started. Maybe I should visit the library for some manga resources.

Oh, and I went to watch L Change the World just now. I saw a scene of a maid cafe in Japan during the show, and now I have this urge to get on the next Tiger Airways flight for Yui’s country. There’s such a cafe in Singapore too, but it probably sucks unless the waitresses have gone through plastic surgery or something like that to enlarge their eyes. By the way, I have something to tell you. Sky of Love releases on 6th March! Finally, something good. The lead actress is named Yui, but its another Yui, not the singer damn it. I hope it hasn’t been over-censored by the MDA, or I’d be really disappointed. It’s similar to Juno as they both have the exact same themes.

End of the post for today.

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Terrorism Reborn : Rise of the JI

Alleged JI leader escapes from jail

AN intense manhunt is under way today for the alleged leader of the Jemaah Islamiah militant network in Singapore following his escape from custody.

Mas Selamat bin Kastari, who was accused of planning to hijack a plane and crash it into Changi Airport in Singapore, escaped yesterday from the Whitley Road Detention Centre, the home affairs ministry said.

“We confirm that he has not been captured as yet,” a spokeswoman said. The ministry said Kastari walks with a limp and was not known to be armed.

The Straits Times reported that thousands of police were assigned to the manhunt but Home Affairs said it could not provide numbers.

Dozens of paramilitary Nepalese Gurkhas from a special Singapore Police contingent were deployed every few metres along roads surrounding the detention centre, near the upscale Raffles Town Club, late yesterday.

The Whitley Road facility holds prisoners detained by the Internal Security Department.

Despite its compact size and high population density, Singapore has thickly forested nature reserves and water catchment areas that can provide escape routes and hiding places for a fugitive.

The ministry announced in June 2006 that Kastari and four other JI members had been detained under the Internal Security Act, which allows for detention without trial.

Kastari was arrested by Indonesian authorities in East Java in January that year before being handed over to Singapore.

Authorities have blamed JI for a string of attacks across the region, including the 2002 bombings in the Indonesian resort island of Bali, which killed 202 people, including 88 Australians.

Singapore, a staunch US ally, says it is a top target for extremists.

Officials have said extremists planned to attack a bus carrying Americans to a subway station in 2001, but authorities foiled that attack by arresting 15 people including members of JI.

A terrorist has escaped from jail, and the finger of death should be pointed at none another than the errant force that claims to police Singapore, keeping it safe from nutters who like to play with bombs. If you have read the article, there seems to be loopholes all over the thing. Let’s liken this JI leader to Saddam. Did Saddam escape? Did he manage to sneak out from a supposedly high-security dentention facility? No. He was killed viciously by white supremacists, an end he deserved for being bearded since all bearded people have evil intentions. Don’t believe me? Look at Osama and the Big Show.

Many eyebrows have been raised since the escape of the terrorist, and thus we have a few questions to ask. How did he do it? How did he even get the chance to be alone for even 5 seconds under police dentention? Was he allowed to visit the toilet without an escort? And even so, how did he run out of the facility without anyone’s notice? We suspect a conspiracy is at foot, and we intend to expose it at all costs. Starting from tomorrow, an anonymous task force will undertake the re-capturing of the JI man. It will become famous, and at the same time receive millions of dollars for its efforts in keeping the country safe. He can run, but he sure as hell can’t hide.

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Free Free

set me free
I wanna be free
I believe you set me free

free…. I wanna be free
free…. I wanna be free

Yeh! Don’t let him make you dance to his tune
but I believe you
Yeh! beat time to the music
I wish I could be set free

Toumei na anata no omoi ga kirei ni sasaru itai kurai
Tomannai kokoro no AISOREESHON yurashite suimen mitai ni

be free
I wanna be free
set me free
I wanna be free
I believe you set me free

I wanna be free I wanna be free

Aimai na atashi no omoi ga kirei ni nagare ochiru
Waraenai namida no FANDEESHON yurashite suimen mitai ni

be free
I wanna be free
set me free
I wanna be free

be free
I wanna be free
set me free
I wanna be free
I believe you set me free

I wanna be free I wanna be free……

I’m trying to take a diverse interest in Japanese music, so I’ve decided to switch to Ami Suzuki for today. It’s an addictive techno song that has a nice tune to it, so it’ll be on the playlist for now. Nice video eh?

Oh yeah, I started reading Bowling King today. It’s a really cute comic with hilarious antics, and has softcore ecchi here and there. Highly recommended for those who like sport mangas.

There’s more. We had two tests in class today, English and AMath. I’d be lying if I said that the AMath paper was easy. I had expected questions from the textbook to appear, in which case I would have gotten 25 marks worth of free food. The actual test was shocking. I have just one thing to say. I got a B4 in art during primary school, but I understand the basic concepts of using a ruler to draw accurate diagrams. I am also well-versed in the law of proportions, such as the magical three proportions. The ideal one would be 36-24.5-36.5, but I’m unconvinced that it will appear before me. The mind can be perverted, but it DOES know how to connect lines to each other, at the very least.

I think I screwed up the English essay for the common test. I chose question 3, boredom, simply because 1 and 2 were too dry and noobish, and 4 failed to conform with my ideals. I wrote about this really sexy Japanese girl whose intelligence puts even the most hardcore China scholar to shame. She was too owning, and as a result felt bored. Okay, let’s try a different approach, since structured sentences are a hassle to form.

Imba girl is bored -> becomes prostitute

I’m highly skeptical that this will work, unless Mohan doesn’t get my point. Wait, I feel better already.

I learned another Japanese word, chotto mata. It means “wait” woohoo~

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This Makes it Three Posts Dedicated to Yui

I went to watch Juno today. Went to TM first at 3.30 or so to pick up the tickets, dressed in a comfy blue tee and black pants ensemble. The queue was very long, as if it were the queue to obtain tickets for YOG 2010. I was behind this couple who were displaying refined PDA, which made me feel fubar. Behind me was this bunch of bimbos talking so loudly I could hear them even with Rolling Star blasting from my earphones. This is ridiculous, I need noise insulation pronto. I decided to take my frustration of dropping a divine rapier in a pub game out on these suckers. Rummaging through my virtual memory banks, I realised that I had not collected my GV membership card. A plan began to take shape. After the affectionate couple had bought their tickets, I walked to the counter and asked for three tickets to Fool’s Gold. This was easy, since the show in question is rated PG. The cashier printed out the tickets, and asked for $28.50 in payment. Then, I told her that I also wanted three tickets for Juno. I had not expected the reaction I got. “You in JC right?”, mouthed the stupid cashier. I concurred weakly and she began printing yet another three tickets. Next, I requested for my membership card. How cute, it’s in the shape of a tub of popcorn. I could feel the negative aura of the bimbos behind me. It was obvious that their wrath had been incurred, and they were prepared to strike at full fury. I paid the money and left hastily, chuckling to myself for wasting approximately five minutes of their time.

I like Juno. Juno is about teenage pregnancy, as I’ve mentioned before. The actress, Ellen Page, is only 20 this year, looks like she has a bright future just waiting to be explored. Her diction was what one could expect of a standard American teenager, and she was quite pretty before the pregnancy occurred. The cinema was occupied by mainly couples in their 20s, and there was this couple sitting beside me. They were fondling so passionately that the woman’s bag was somehow shoved into my seat. I reached my hand into the bag, and discovered a long pointy device, perhaps a pregnancy test kit. However, upon further reflection, i realised that it could have well been just an ordinary pen. Damn, I must have been influenced by Juno. In the show, Juno is aged 16. That’s something like a Secondary 4 student getting pregnant, which is kind of rare in Singapore. It barely happens, like a meteor shower.

“I want an abortion”
“How old are you?”
“16”

The classic three liner from the movie. We’re done here.

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This Post is also Dedicated to Yui

Tobidashita SUNIIKAA
Hito no nami ni sakarau you ni
Aruita Can I come back?
Dousureba yokatta darou?

Hanayaka na machinami datte
Shinde yuku kaerimichi
Crazy passion/Easy action
Uke tomete hoshi katta no ni

Namida no Merry.Go.Round kagayaki ni tomadou
I’m just a baby Oh! mind

Sayonara Merry.Go.Round aijou ga kara mawari shita
feeling is the Merry.Go.Round

Tachidomaru kousaten
Furimuke nai no kitaishite iru
Yasashi sa ni Can I come back?
Yudaneru koto ga dekinai

SHIGUNARU ga ao ni kawatte
Watashi wa mata aruki dasu
Doushita no? Is this all?
Oikakete hoshi katta no ni

Namida no Merry.Go.Round kagayaki ni tomadou
I’m just a baby Oh! Mind

Sayonara Merry.Go.Round aijou ga kara mawari shita
feeling is the Merry.Go.Round

Namida no Merry.Go.Round kanashimi ga tomara nai
I’m just a baby Oh! Mind

Sayonara Merry.Go.Round kesa naide sou negau dake
feeling is the Merry.Go.Round

One Yui song a post is gradually becoming the staple on this blog. What else did you expect? With the various depictions of Yui plastered all over the page, one could only come to conclude that the author must be a Yui-otaku. You’re right, actually. I’ve taken a liking to the clean vocals of Yui, and the soothing feeling I get from a majority of her songs. Some of them are filled with rock chords though, and those are simply splendid in their own way. If you didn’t already know, she’s only 21. That’s roughly the age when puberty’s development in females is brought to an abrupt halt. I feel sad. Really I do. Yui stands at a dwarfish height of 156cm, and this gives her the impression of a adolescent. This is amplified to the power of two when she’s holding one of her acoustic guitars. If only there was a way to reignite the growth hormones yet again. After a bout of intensive research, I have unearthed two solutions to this pressing matter at hand. The first, would be to pray and hope that a miracle happens. This coincidentally fails 100% of the time, so we shall skip to the alternative. Okay, it’s hard to put this across, reasons being that this is a family-friendly blog and we do not encourage the explicit description of the male or the female anatomy here. Let’s do this slowly.

1) Google Jolin Tsai’s first album cover
2) Google her lastest album, Dancing Diva
3) Compare the difference. You should get a result of at least 10cm.

As I thought about it in my chair of divinity, my omnipotence presented me with a thought so provoking it was bathed in a hue of all the ecchi mangas I’ve ever read. Do we really want another Jolin Tsai? At this time, I was playing Deal or No Deal on my mobile, and the scrooge of a banker offered me a sum of 56 dollars. The answer was clear. It was like a message delivered from the Messiah himself. Digging out the Swiss bank book I had stashed under my bed at the time of my birth for rainy days such as this, I constructed a plan that transcended all boundaries of human comprehension. The fabric of this brainchild is one of the most complex theories that exist in this universe, possibly esclipsing the possible election of Obama. We are planning to raze all figure enhancement salons in Japan to the ground. And by we, I mean me and the seven split personalities that co-exist within the same body. Be warned, I am ecchi and dangerous. Lock your doors and secure your closets, you never know when I might appear. I’d also like to take this opportunity to warn you of my powers of teleportation. Have you watched Jumper? Yes, I can do that, and more. I can also use the Shadow Doppelganger Jutsu from Naruto and put into action a molesting spree in Orchard Road. But I wouldn’t do that, because I’m a nice person, and we all know that nice people don’t take zoomed pictures with their swanky 5-Megapixel camera phones as they’re going up the escalator, with a pheromone-radiating female a few meters in front of your person. That’s just immoral and perverted, traits that adhere to the character of the person who has been leaving his bras and panties behind at the base of the staircase coming down from my school. It’s bad enough that they’re repulsive in terms of aesthetics. If you want something classier, try La Senza Express at Tampines Mall. Mind you, I had the misfortune of entering it once due to situational difficulties, and it’s something I’d never attempt to pull off again. Anyway, these bras differ from the norm because.. well, they’re meant for the well-endowed. It induces vomit, because the only people who’d wear these are fat indians who’ve consumed too much ghee, not that I have anything against the jolly folks of Mumbai and Co.

I have really gone off topic here, but let’s proceed to the ultimatum of this ingenious plan that’s been nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. I call it, “The Destruction of Silicone Valley”. I hope you understand what silicone is. It’s not the element from the periodic table. It’s what Jean Yip uses for their treatments. By reading on, you pledge to partake in a revolutionary idea that will preserve the shape of humankind, literally speaking.

After packing the luggage, I will board my private plane for Japan. The reason for this is to evade security checks imposed by the government, and for that touch of sophisticacy. Upon arrival, I head into a public toilet to change into my ecchi personality. With the sheer boldness of this form, I’ll experience Japan to the fullest. It’s time to head for the peak hour train rush! Actually, we’re not going anywhere near there, because it’s a well-known fact that bullet trains are filled to the core with bullets that kill people. We will be heading for the Harajuku district of Japan, as it is considered the haven of revealing clothes, the epitome of ecchi. Another interesting fact to note would be the number of beauty parlours that litter the place around there. Remember, silicone is vulnerable to fire. That is why Jolin Tsai is banned from saunas. We shall draw first blood on the beauty parlours with the assault of fire! Upon decimation of the entire area, we shall return, not as revolutionaries, but heroes.

Of course, all great plans require ample preparation. That is why I’m going to bed now. Byebye.

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This Post is Dedicated to Yui

hi no ataru basho ni dete ryoute wo
doro darake yo najimenai tokai de
onaji you ni waraenai utsumuite aruita no
isogiashi de surechigau hitotachi
“yume wa kanaimashita ka?” atashi mada mogaiteru

kodomo no koro ni modoru yori mo ima wo umaku ikite mitai yo
kowagari wa umaretsuki

hi no ataru basho ni dete ryoute wo hirogete mita nara
ano sora koete yukeru kana? nante omotta n’ da

tobitatsu tame no tsubasa mada mienai
kantan ni ikanai kara ikite yukeru

nureta koinu hiroiageta dake de
chotto waraechau hodo namida ga koborete kita
ai saretai ai saretai bakari
atashi itte ita yo ne motomeru dake ja dame ne

kodomo no koro wa MAMA no koto hidoku kizutsuketa hi mo atta yo ne
kawaritai ima zenbu

hi no ataru basho ni dete kono te wo tsuyoku nigitte mita
ano basho ano toki wo kowashite I can change my life

demo kokoro no naka subete wo totemo tsutaekirenai
kantan ni ikanai kara ikite yukeru

hi no ataru basho ni dete chizu wo hirogete miru kedo
I know… You know… mayoimichi mo shikata nai
I can change my life

sugite kita hibi zenbu de ima no atashi nan da yo
kantan ni ikanai kara ikite yukeru

Hahaha some Yui~

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Migration : Manga to Anime

Oh my, such a cute anime! See the lyrics when watching the video ftw!

The theme still holds though. Ecchi.

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