There are some pleasures in life which are only accessible to us from a certain age onwards. I don’t mean the thing that goes on after weddings, however much it pains me to say this. It’s more of an issue of being taken seriously.
The many shortcomings of adolescence became evident to me the day I went to Sim Lim Square to purchase a pair of earbuds. The white Sennheiser MX360s were suffering from a sever case of wear and tear; I can actually hear the drivers rattling at higher volumes, and the Razer Protones I picked up as replacement really disappointed me. Come on, you don’t just fork out $60 for earphones that sound only slightly better than a cheap pair retailing at $25.90, right? Even more infuriating was the fact that sound kept leaking out of the empty space between the earphone and my ear, at one time even prompting some lady on the MRT to request that I turn down the volume. Then I decided. I had to sell this piece of rubbish. I posted advertisments on Vr-Zone, and finally some sucker took it off my hands for $50. Despite taking into account the fact that I had just squandered $10 for no apparent reason, I felt that it was worth it. That’s just how much the Razers suck. I had the misconception that they were good when I tried them in a quiet environment, but take them to your everyday public transport and you’ll experience adulterated sound. Which sucks.
This week, I made yet another trip to Sim Lim Square. After doing some research, I settled on this pair from Audio Technica. Research..why? Simply put, I didn’t want to waste money unneccessarily. Money is like this status symbol, and you can’t deny the fact that having crisp notes in your coffers somehow gratifies you. Money can also be converted to other forms of material possessions, like a Lancer Evo X. I’ve always been infatuated with the Lancer Evo series, with how they manage to provide two-litre, 200+ BHP turboes that match lower-range Porsches in terms of starting acceleration, all at a cost of approximately 110 grand. Owning such loud cars gives others the impression of bengness. I beg to differ. Bengs drive WRXes, and tensais drive Evos, it’s a simple deduction really.
Anyway, the CK52s that I got cost $45, but I was really pleased with them. The sound insulation trashed the Razers by leaps and bounds, and the sound was… bliss. Well, for the price I personally feel that it’s an amazingly good deal. It lacks in bass though, but you’d have to pay an additional $21 for the set with stronger bass. Here comes my gripe – purchasing the set. I entered the shop to take a look around. Alas, it was rather crowded. After some jostling(and I think I groped something in the confusion), I managed to get the earbuds off the rack. So, I went to pay, and the girl at the cashier was like, “This one 50 dollar.” Till this point, I hadn’t even spoken a word. Really, does she think that students can’t afford anything over $20? I chose to ignore this outrageous behaviour, however, as the earbuds were rather cheap. I haggled the price down the $45 before forking over the cash, and it comes with a 1 year warranty. Sweet.
I tried it on the bus ride home, and it was amazing. The rubber buds fitted perfectly and blocked out unwanted sounds like the constant bitching of three noobish neighbourhood school girls behind me. For once, I was oblivious to the roar of the bus, which was a problem that had plagued me thus far in my path to achieve greater sound clarity. Speaking of the three girls, they were rather pleasing to look at. I could swear I saw a sliver of white when one of them got off the elevated platform while alighting from the bus.
Back to this issue of bitching. Currently, I have been doing alright in my studies. I still feel sore about today’s AMath paper, though. I could have gotten my first perfect score in secondary school math, had I differentiated the equation before equating it to zero. Damn. I’ll probably get another 16 again, which just sucks. When tests of such low standards are presented to us, it’s like telling us that a perfect grade is near. But seriously, I wonder how the solution to question 4 eluded the majority of our class.
Next week will be good; a Physics test spanning three chapters. Finally, time to leave the stragglers behind for good. Owning in this test equates to an untouchable mark for CA, which is always good to have. Now, about the issue that has been going on in 4L. I find it ludicrous, personally. An empty vessel complaining about yet another empty vessel. It’s like having a person with overactive sweat glands proclaiming the dustbin to be smelly. You know, the person who initiated this whole fiasco actually makes the biggest din in class. She bitches, and she screams. It wouldn’t be so bad if I had a solid pair of noise-insulating earphones in my ears all the time, but M***n’s Third Law of Classroom Decorum states that thy shall only listen to the soothing Bollywood themes that flow out of Her Ferrero Rocherness, all while showcasing the power of Visa via the mass-freeing of birds in Mumbai. I tried eating a pack of sour candies in class the other day, and nearly got pwned. She should seriously consider a career in the WWE.
“From Mumbai, India… weighing in at 350 pounds.. the Great M***n!!!”
Yeah, and her entrance video would depict an Indian couple dancing round a cherry tree, which to be blatantly honest, is rather stereotypical. Her finisher would be this Five Star Frog Splash from the turnbuckle, putting those ghee-induced fats to good use.
Anyway, back to the subject. The noisy push-ups that spends her life fucking posters, as quoted from a friend from a foreign land. Many a time I have felt an urge to tell her to shut her trap, but resisted, because I’ve decided to be a tad more peaceful after reading those shoujo mangas. She also plays horrible music that belongs to the vilest hellholes that exist while people are trying to study, and somehow has this impression that she commands a hundred or so would-be suitors, although the chance of these suitors actually existing is roughly equal to the probability that I lose interest in figures entirely, which is exactly zero possibility. I would like to scold her now. Just because you don’t give a damn about your own future doesn’t mean the rest of us don’t. After dropping to noob science, do you still fucking think that studies are of no importance? I seldom use vulgarities in my post, but I feel that I have to include a few in this one to better convey my thoughts. She barely escaped the chopping block last year, and managed to remain in the L class, but fuck it, I wouldn’t mind donating a rough sum of a thousand bucks to the school just to get her out of our class and into 4M, where she can scream the fucking walls down without anyone complaining. Yeah, and her little pal should scram off along with her. This second lard bucket obstructs my view of the whiteboard, and every time she turns around, she reveals the triple chins and a ridiculously bulbous face which makes me feel that I should never eat anything ever again for fear of ending up like her. Times like this I wish Mohan would do something constructive instead of ranting in my ear about how 18/25 is bad. You think that’s abyssmal? What about those who failed? It’s like telling them their scripts belong in the bin. Alright, Mohan should move the loudhailer and her rotound little porky companion to the extreme right of the classroom, far away from my sight. It really has adverse effects on my health when I am in the process of eating something and I catch a glimpse of the pig’s face. Vomit rushes up while the food tries to flow down the gullet, which translates to a spoilt meal.
Loo shared something interesting just now. Apparently, we will have sexual education classes next week during SEL period! Somehow, I hope they’ve upped the ante from the rubbish we had in Primary 6.
“Boy, want to see something?”
All these while the female population was educated on the subject of tampons. How cheap can they get? You give them tampons and expect us to be sastified with some pathetic video screening? At least give us some spare condoms, so we have something to put our umbrellas in on wet days.
Phew, I’m tired.
1) All references to organisations have been removed.
2) By the way, the author would like to comment on the recent episode of Wo Cai Cai Cai. One word should sum it up.